WHY IS HE HITTING JESUS???

Hola Familia!!!

Things are still going great here.  I just love being a missionary.  Every day is always such an adventure, this week especially.  Sounds like things are exciting back home too.  I am glad you all got the skunk out of the window well without killing it, like a bunch of resourceful Chapinos!

Hermana H___________ and I have had a crazy (and hilarious) week here in the field. 

Let me start by explaining the subject line:

Hermana H_________ and I have been (trying) to teach a new investigator named X_________ and her 4 sons.  However, works super weird hours and is hard to track down.  Whenever we pass for her, her 8 year old (J________) son always wants us to share something with him.  So we usually bring him out into the street and share a quick scripture. 

Two nights ago, we were teaching J________ about repentance.  But here´s the catch, J______ has the most intense case of ADD I have ever seen.  Imagine Jordon Shurtliff without medication the day after Halloween (Shout out to you Elder Shurtliff for your first week in the field!). 

Anyway.... This is about how the lesson went.

Me:¨So J_____, we have to repent and be baptized to follow Jesus.  What do we need to do to follow Jesus?¨

J_____: ¨What´s in your backpack?! Other books? Is it heavy? Do you have folletos in there??? When are we going to read the Book of Mormon?¨

Hermana H_______ (while holding up a picture of John the Baptist baptizing Jesus): ¨What is happening in this picture, J_______?¨

J_______: ¨That guy is saving God! No wait.... He is worshiping him.  No wait.... HE´S HITTING GOD!!!! WHY IS HE HITTING GOD?!!!!¨ (In the picture John the Baptist has his arm raised to the square)

Me (trying not to laugh):  ¨No its ok he is just baptizing him:¨

Hermana H________: ¨And before we get baptized, we have to repent.  Have you ever heard of repentance before?¨

J_____: ¨Of course! Repentance is when there is a man and a woman, and they are boyfriend and girlfried! Then after a while they decide to...¨

Us: ¨NO! NO! THAT IS NOT REPENTANCE!¨

Needless to say, we love teaching J_______.  He is hilarious.

Hermana H________ and I have also been working on some new ways to find new investigators.  For example, last Tuesday while knocking doors Hermana H_______ was bitten by a dog.  Now, if you had any idea how many dogs live in P_______, this would not surprise you.  The part that was shocking was that this wasn’t one of the dogs that we usually run away from. 

There are 2 kinds of Guatemalan dogs:

Type A: Disgusting Guatemalan dogs that seem too sickly and pathetic to attack

Type B: Disgusting Guatemalan dogs that are so sickly they are willing to eat human flesh to survive.

This dog appeared to be in the ¨type a¨ category.  It pathetically crawled up to Hermana H_____ and, without any warning growl or anything, chomped her right on the leg and then kept walking.

It was bizarre.

But then we had to go and find the owner of said dog to see if it was vaccinated, or if we should just start planning Hermana H________´s funeral immediately.

Turns out, the dog belongs to Juan,  a middle aged single guy who lives along with his 8 dogs (only one isn´t vaccinated, and it isn’t the one who bit Hermana H________). 

Well once your dog bites a strange gringa girl, you are basically obligated to listen to her message about Jesus, too.  Turns out he is super positive and is going to come to church next week (couldn’t last week because he was out of town).

Sometimes Heavenly Father just works in mysterious ways.

Good thing he wants to progress, because the nurse tells us that we have to pass by every few days to make sure the dog hasn’t died of any diseases (I am not sure what to do if it does.)

And, ¨Can we share a message?¨is less awkward than ¨Is your dog dead yet?¨

The bite isn’t even that bad!

Other finding news strategy:  This week our rain coats got wet, and like everything else in Guatemala, started growing mold. 

Which forced us to make a p-day purchase of some fashionable ponchos... upside, now everyone can see us coming to bring them the word of God from a mile away. 

Any publicity is good publicity.... Right?

This week really has been great.  We have seen so many miracles; we had 11 investigators in church on Sunday.... INCREDIBLE.  We had investigators bringing other investigators to church.  The people here in P________ really have been prepared.  I love it here.  This week is also the last week of the Broughs, which is bittersweet.  They have worked so hard for this mission and done so much.  They really are incredible.  I truly believe that the reason I was supposed to turn in my papers after a semester instead of a year of school was to get to work with the Broughs for this short time.  It´s hard to say goodbye, but we know that they are off to do other amazing things.

Also, next week I will be a fourth of the way through my mission..... How does that even happen??? Time flies here.  FLIES!

Well, I am glad you are all doing well.  I love you all a lot. 

It has been raining this week.... I will include a picture (there is a pile of floating diapers cropped right out of it.... so hygenic)

Make good choices everyone!!! Love you all

Hermana Wise

Just kidding, the computer won’t read my card... Check Hermana H_________´s blog for pictures :)