WHY IS HE HITTING JESUS???

Hola Familia!!!

Things are still going great here.  I just love being a missionary.  Every day is always such an adventure, this week especially.  Sounds like things are exciting back home too.  I am glad you all got the skunk out of the window well without killing it, like a bunch of resourceful Chapinos!

Hermana H___________ and I have had a crazy (and hilarious) week here in the field. 

Let me start by explaining the subject line:

Hermana H_________ and I have been (trying) to teach a new investigator named X_________ and her 4 sons.  However, works super weird hours and is hard to track down.  Whenever we pass for her, her 8 year old (J________) son always wants us to share something with him.  So we usually bring him out into the street and share a quick scripture. 

Two nights ago, we were teaching J________ about repentance.  But here´s the catch, J______ has the most intense case of ADD I have ever seen.  Imagine Jordon Shurtliff without medication the day after Halloween (Shout out to you Elder Shurtliff for your first week in the field!). 

Anyway.... This is about how the lesson went.

Me:¨So J_____, we have to repent and be baptized to follow Jesus.  What do we need to do to follow Jesus?¨

J_____: ¨What´s in your backpack?! Other books? Is it heavy? Do you have folletos in there??? When are we going to read the Book of Mormon?¨

Hermana H_______ (while holding up a picture of John the Baptist baptizing Jesus): ¨What is happening in this picture, J_______?¨

J_______: ¨That guy is saving God! No wait.... He is worshiping him.  No wait.... HE´S HITTING GOD!!!! WHY IS HE HITTING GOD?!!!!¨ (In the picture John the Baptist has his arm raised to the square)

Me (trying not to laugh):  ¨No its ok he is just baptizing him:¨

Hermana H________: ¨And before we get baptized, we have to repent.  Have you ever heard of repentance before?¨

J_____: ¨Of course! Repentance is when there is a man and a woman, and they are boyfriend and girlfried! Then after a while they decide to...¨

Us: ¨NO! NO! THAT IS NOT REPENTANCE!¨

Needless to say, we love teaching J_______.  He is hilarious.

Hermana H________ and I have also been working on some new ways to find new investigators.  For example, last Tuesday while knocking doors Hermana H_______ was bitten by a dog.  Now, if you had any idea how many dogs live in P_______, this would not surprise you.  The part that was shocking was that this wasn’t one of the dogs that we usually run away from. 

There are 2 kinds of Guatemalan dogs:

Type A: Disgusting Guatemalan dogs that seem too sickly and pathetic to attack

Type B: Disgusting Guatemalan dogs that are so sickly they are willing to eat human flesh to survive.

This dog appeared to be in the ¨type a¨ category.  It pathetically crawled up to Hermana H_____ and, without any warning growl or anything, chomped her right on the leg and then kept walking.

It was bizarre.

But then we had to go and find the owner of said dog to see if it was vaccinated, or if we should just start planning Hermana H________´s funeral immediately.

Turns out, the dog belongs to Juan,  a middle aged single guy who lives along with his 8 dogs (only one isn´t vaccinated, and it isn’t the one who bit Hermana H________). 

Well once your dog bites a strange gringa girl, you are basically obligated to listen to her message about Jesus, too.  Turns out he is super positive and is going to come to church next week (couldn’t last week because he was out of town).

Sometimes Heavenly Father just works in mysterious ways.

Good thing he wants to progress, because the nurse tells us that we have to pass by every few days to make sure the dog hasn’t died of any diseases (I am not sure what to do if it does.)

And, ¨Can we share a message?¨is less awkward than ¨Is your dog dead yet?¨

The bite isn’t even that bad!

Other finding news strategy:  This week our rain coats got wet, and like everything else in Guatemala, started growing mold. 

Which forced us to make a p-day purchase of some fashionable ponchos... upside, now everyone can see us coming to bring them the word of God from a mile away. 

Any publicity is good publicity.... Right?

This week really has been great.  We have seen so many miracles; we had 11 investigators in church on Sunday.... INCREDIBLE.  We had investigators bringing other investigators to church.  The people here in P________ really have been prepared.  I love it here.  This week is also the last week of the Broughs, which is bittersweet.  They have worked so hard for this mission and done so much.  They really are incredible.  I truly believe that the reason I was supposed to turn in my papers after a semester instead of a year of school was to get to work with the Broughs for this short time.  It´s hard to say goodbye, but we know that they are off to do other amazing things.

Also, next week I will be a fourth of the way through my mission..... How does that even happen??? Time flies here.  FLIES!

Well, I am glad you are all doing well.  I love you all a lot. 

It has been raining this week.... I will include a picture (there is a pile of floating diapers cropped right out of it.... so hygenic)

Make good choices everyone!!! Love you all

Hermana Wise

Just kidding, the computer won’t read my card... Check Hermana H_________´s blog for pictures :)

ARE YOU MARRIED TO YOUR WIFE?

HOLA FAMILIA!

Good news, I am still in Guatemala. 

This week has been interesting.  Apparently the world cup is happening?  We can always tell because P_________ turns into a ghost town anytime Germany, Spain, or Brazil are playing.  I have no idea why no one seems to root for Honduras.  Come on, people root for your home continent!  It is pretty funny to hear GOOOOOOOOOOL! echoing from every lamina house in P_________ during the games.  I keep telling Hermana H_________ that I want to yell ¨METAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!¨But she informs me that no one will think that I am funny.

Come on, bilingual friends... Acknowledge that I´m funny.

We have been asked a quite a few times this week if we are from Germany... No.  Los estados unidos.

Speaking of my nationality, this week Hermana H___________ and I where teaching two (possibly drunk) men about the Gospel in the street.  Halfway through my explanation of Joseph Smith,  one of the men asked where we were from…

Sigh.... ¨Los estados unidos.¨

The man then proceeded to explain that I was lying to him and that only Hermana H__________ is from the states and that he believes I am from some other country instead. 

¨No, really.... I´m from Utah.¨

Ï know the United States, Utah doesn’t exist.  If you are from the United States that means that you are a Gringa.... You aren´t a Gringa!!!¨

Well, I didn’t really know how to respond to that one, so we just kept teaching.

Good news!!!! Mariela is baptized!!!! It was absolutely a miracle and such a blessing to get to be a part of her baptismal service.  The whole ward showed up, the young women all sang, and Hermana Alverado made her a cake.  The whole thing was just beautiful. 

Then, if it wasn’t already the most beautiful thing you ever heard of, there was a double rainbow when we walked out of her baptism.  It could not have been more perfect.  It was like a gift from God directly to Mariela.

Life is great people.

We are currently working with some super pilas investigators who want to get baptized.  They are a little family named Jose, Manuel and Yuvis.   They came to church on their own after just one visit (such a miracle).  During the first visit we asked them:

¨Are you guys married?¨

to which they responded

¨Yes!¨

They are both super positive.  She gave up coffee completely and he gave up smoking, drinking, and coffee cold turkey.  Who needs AA? Just talk to the missionaries!!!

(this was incredible, NO ONE gets married here).  It wasn´t until the next visit that we realized.... Yes! They are both married..... to other people.

HOORAY DOUBLE ADULTERY!

So we need a serious miracle here in P_______ so they can both get divorced, married, and baptized by the end of the month. Can we do it? NO.  Can God grant us a miracle and make it happen? Of course!!!

Pray for a miracle, people!

I am so glad that you all liked your cards!!! I sure had fun sending them. I am quite terrified about this ¨thing¨ that Lincoln is sending me.

Funny quote of the week: 

(While teaching a couple of our recent converts with their 7 year old nephew)

Me: ¨So, God will help us with all of our problems! He knows us perfectly, and will always help us when we pray.¨

Hermana H_________ ¨So, what can we do when we have problems?¨

7 year old boy ¨CALL THE POLICE!!!!¨

Good answer,  not what we were looking for. 

Thanks for all of your support and love!!! I love you all and hope you have a great week.

Thanks for everything!

Also, how have I been here for 4 months??? Wow, time flies

Happy Fathers day, Dad!

Hermana Wise

The Power of Prayer

Wow, Miracles.

This week was absolutely incredible.  Difficult, frustrating, but faith-promoting and wonderful. 

Let me begin by explaining two of my favorite investigators: 

Mariela and Fransisco are two youth in our ward who began taking the discussions a year ago.  Mariela is 15 and Fransisco, her brother, is 14. Both have been diligently attending church since the time they first met with the missionaries.  Mariela has even left with us for visits a few times.  The only problem is, their parents are completely unsupportive and have refused to sign their permission forms.  When we go to visit them, they have a hand written sign hanging over the wall in their living room that reads ¨we won’t give up until we are baptized.  We WILL follow the example of Jesus Christ.¨ For the past six months, Mariela has been carrying a blank baptismal permission form with her so that her mom can sign it the moment she has a change of heart. 

But, despite countless cycles of missionaries fasting, praying, and working with the family things looked pretty hopeless.

But, Hermana H_________ and I set a goal (with a lot of faith) to baptize them this month.

So us, the ward, Mariela and Fransisco, my family back home, and the entire Mormon Tabernacle Choir have been praying and praying for a miracle.

And then it happened:  Wednesday morning we got a call from a tearful Mariela:

¨Hermanas, do you have time to visit me today? Bishop says I need a interview with your district leader for my baptism.¨

WHAT?!

Apparently, Mariela´s mom has a friend at work to got really sick.  Mariela and Fransisco set aside some time to pray for her specifically while their mom was there.  The woman quickly recovered.  This experience was apparently what it took to soften the heart of their mother.  She finally signed the papers. 

That same day we visited Mariela and Fransisco after mission prep (unfortunately, we had divisions so Hermana H________ missed this).  But, we visited them with two other young women in the ward, one of whom is also a convert.  It was easily the coolest lesson of my life.  We talked about what it means to ¨take the name of the Lord upon you.¨ It basically turned into a testimony meeting between Mariela, Fransisco, the young women in the ward, and the missionaries. 

The best part? The end of the lesson when I got to say:

¨Mariela, you have been waiting for this for a long time.... Will you follow the example of Jesus Christ and be baptized by someone with the proper authority of God on the 15th of June?¨ I was crying so hard I could barely stumble through it.  But she choked out a

¨si¨

¨And Fransisco, will you follow the example of Jesus Christ and be baptized by someone with the proper authority of God on the 22 of June?¨ (he wants to wait for his birthday)

¨Si!¨

Easily the greatest moment of my whole mission up to this point.  Mariela and Fransisco are getting baptized people!!! What a miracle! How cool is it that God answered everyone´s prayers that Mariela and Fransisco would be baptized through the prayers of Mariela and Fransisco?  Prayer works people. 

When we pray we are literally talking to God, and He listens.  He answers us. 

Even if it takes a year. 

Thank you EVERYONE who prayed.  Mariela got all choked up when I told her the whole choir was praying for her.  Thank you for that dad.  Please pass on my thanks to the choir. 

Miracles happen every single day when we look for them. 

I love you all so much.  I love my calling.  I love these people.

Funny moment of the week:

While teaching about the first vision, I was talking to a little family about why Joseph Smith needed to ask God which church was true.

¨¿Quien sabe todo?¨ (who knows everything?)

Little boy: ¨MI MAMA!¨

Right answer.

Love you all! Thanks for everything!!! Happy fathers day, Dad. 

Keep praying!

Until next week (when we will have pictures of the miracle baptism!)

-Hermana Wise

IF YOU ARE GOING TO COMMIT A CRIME, DON'T WEAR A SKIRT.

HOLA!!!

So this week I have a super embarrassing story to share with all of you...

On Thursday, Hermana H__________ and I had a really positive appointment set up first thing after studies in the morning.  Unfortunately, this appointment was in Brisas, the part of our area that is really hard to get to. 

So, deciding to save some time we took our secret path between La Jolla and Brisas (the very path I explained in my last email.)

As we where sprinting through the field, we realized (much to our dismay) that the hole in the fence that we usually climb through to get into someone else´s vegetable garden had been patched (possibly because they saw two gringas climbing through their vegetable garden).  So, we kept running through the Guatemalan field searching for a way to get to Brisas. 

As we ran, we suddenly came to a giant pit in the middle of nowhere.  It was pretty deep, but we decided to brave it.  Hermana H_________ went first and (although convinced that she was going to get bitten by a snake) jumped into the pit. 

Well, turns out the walls of the pit weren’t incredibly stable.  And, before Hermana H__________ could warn me, I decided to make a  go at it to. 

Unfortunately for me, I lost my footing and was flung violently, headfirst into the hole. 

There I was, splattered on the ground, my stuff flying everywhere, backpack full of scriptures flipped over my head, bleeding with a mouth full of dirt.

I looked HILARIOUS. 

Poor Hermana H_________ looks back to see her hija completely splattered everywhere and she starts laughing.... and laughing.... and laughing

.... And then peeing. 

So there I am, in a ditch picking dirt out of my teeth meanwhile, my companion has peed her pants. 

It was at this very moment that two overly helpful young men come immerging from the wilderness with the intent of saving the helpless white girls. 

Nothing is more awkward than trying to be helped by young men as a sister missionary. 

To make things worse, we still needed to scale the barbed-wire fence. 

Hermana H_________ went first and (by some miracle) managed to get herself AND her pee-soaked skirt over the fence.

I (being the extremely coordinated soul that I am) wasn’t so lucky.  I ended up completely entangled in the barbed wire, shredding my skirt, and forcing me to accept more help from the overly-excited jovens. 

SO, the moral of the story is.... If you are going to trespass, wear sensible clothing.

Other happenings this week:

Truly this week has been a bit rough as far as investigators go.  It seems that we always have super positive lessons throughout the week.  But, our investigators always seem to have SOMETHING keep them from coming to church. But, we have faith that things will improve. 

My favorite part of being a missionary has to be teaching people how to pray.  Even if people don´t accept a second visit, we always teach them how to pray.  Majority of people here either:

1. Memorize specific prayers

2.  Believe they are unworthy to pray directly to God

3.  Have never personally prayed before

There is something so incredible about witnessing someone talk to God for the very first time.  You can tell, in that moment that they can feel their divine connection. They can feel that God is listening.  It´s like their soul was wanting something all this time and we just taught them what it is.  It´s such a blessing to be able to witness it.

Gracias for my package!! I loved it.  Especially the lice shampoo.  Hermana H________ assures me that I will use it.

But really, I almost cried when I saw that you sent me curry.  I can’t even explain how happy it makes me.  I made a batch last night.  Hermana H_________ had never had curry before, but, she is a believer.  We ate it on tortillas.  Because, if I have learned anything here, it’s that you eat everything on a tortilla.

Also, I figured out my pin for the Visa card.  However, the ATMs here won’t accept it for some reason (it says that there is a problem with the card and that I need to call the bank).  So I pulled some money from the other card to pay for my bible.  I hope that’s ok.  But not really sure what to do in the future.

Congrats to Lincoln for getting a job! And to Holly for finishing her first year of teaching!!!

How is it June already, people???

I love you all! Thanks for all your support.  Did you guys get your letters yet?

Until next week,

Sierra